Wednesday, April 14, 2010

The Ten Commandments

Here's another piece I wrote a while back:

Recently my Dad was telling Mom about the 10 commandments of dog ownership that he had read in some sort of doglopedia. He said it really bothered him because if people actually followed this advice, they and their dog would miss out on some of the more rewarding aspects of human/canine relationships. Well, seeing as how I'm already shedding, I thought I could shed some light on this subject before he sits down to write and gives you his long-winded version. I am, after all, a dog and know whereof I speak.


I won't quote, word-for-word, the 10 commandments. You can look them up for yourself if you wish (they appear in Planet Dog as well as other publications). The basic premise is that you, as a human, must establish yourself as the one in charge, the Alpha, in a manner consistent with the social order that exists among canids in the wild in order for the relationship to enjoy any success. The 10 commandments consist of do's and don'ts (mostly don'ts) such as: Don't share your food with the dog (the Alpha's food is his and his alone). Don't share your bed with the dog (the Alpha's den is his and his alone). Don't allow your dog to initiate play lest he think he is in charge. Better to take the proffered toy or ball without comment and then later, of your own volition, initiate some sort of game as if it were your idea (Oh please! Do you really think I'm that dumb?). Don't step over or walk around your dog. Make him move. You're the Alpha after all. Okay, I can see why Dad's a bit peeved about this stuff. First of all, it makes the assumption that I am incapable of differentiating between canid relationships and human relationships. Essentially, the message is that, in order for our relationship to work, you have to be the lead wolf or I won't respect you and will walk all over you. I may possibly even attack you.


Before I launch into my rebuttal, I must say that this information is in no way erroneous if all you're looking for is a successful working relationship with a dog (guarding, herding, tracking etc.) or a relationship that is successful due to lack of conflict and strife but is also equally devoid of the exquisite bonding that is there for the asking. Follow these 10 commandments and it is a good bet that your dog would not try to take advantage of you or challenge your authority. Follow these 10 commandments and it's guaranteed that you'll miss out on the most wonderful bond that is achievable between you and your pet. Think about it. If all I needed was a big, in-charge dog, couldn't I just get that from another dog? What makes my life special is living in and being part of a human's world and a human being a part of mine.


I pretty much love everybody, but I love my Dad more than anything in the world. I also respect his authority. He's large and in charge but he's also a human. He's not another dog and he's not a human trying to act like another dog. He is the senior partner in our dog/human relationship in much the same way you are the authority figure in the relationship with your child. My Dad doesn't do a lot of behavior modification to maintain this role in my life. I do remember a time when I was in my doggy teens that Dad took some time to do some formal limit setting with me (I can be rather strong-willed and pushy with my underlings sometimes) but mostly it just comes from the heart. I obey him primarily out of love and respect rather than training and correction. Our relationship is one of give and take, not command and obey. If your son or daughter came running up to you with a toy or game, would you just take it from them without comment only to offer it later as if it were your idea? Would you make them move every time they were where you wanted to be? Would you deny them a handful of your popcorn or a sip of your sweet tea? Do they disrespect you when you honor their requests for playtime or to share your snack? Do they stop loving you when you don't bully them out of your way?


One of my favorite things in this world is, at the end of the day, falling out with my Dad (and a dozen or so doggy friends) on the bed to watch some TV and maybe have some popcorn or crackers (Cheeze-its, I love Cheeze-its). Does this mean that I'm challenging his authority? I know that I'm there cause Dad loves me and wants to spend time with me not because I'm taking over his den. I also love to go for rides and, every time we get near the car, I'll ask him if we can go. Now, a lot of times he tells me no or that I'll have to wait some but what he doesn't do is just ignore me. We have kind of the same understanding about walks. Even though I'm pretty much always with him when he's not working at the mill, I'd rather be with him walking in the woods and will ask to do so any time we get within sight of the trail. I'm pretty sure he'll usually tell me I have to wait some but I'm also sure that he knows I'm wanting to go and will take me when he gets a chance but the point is that he recognizes that I'm asking and gives me an answer even if it's not the one I'm looking for. We have different standards for different situations. I know that when we're working I have to kind of stay close by if I want to be a part of what he's doing. I can't just go stirring up all of the dogs in the shelter. I'd really like to do that but I'd rather be with him. I always hear people who come to the shelter tell him what a good girl I am and how they wish their dog would just hang out with them like that. Dad never trained me to be this way. I hang out with him because I want to be with him and respect his rules because I want him to want me to be with him. Now when we're out in the woods or at the beach, the situation is different and I have a lot more say in things. In any given situation, I've got a pretty good idea how far Dad's willing to let me range ahead. If I'm in doubt, I'll ask him (all it takes is a look). When we come to a trail juncture, again, I'll ask which way we're going. Sometimes he'll just point or sometimes he'll let me choose. There's a lot of give and take in all of this and yes, sometimes I'll try to take advantage of the situation ( much like the give 'em an inch and they'll take a mile rule that human children subscribe to) but our communication also provides me with an idea as to what is negotiable and what is not. I know that when I hear that drawn out Cocopuff, nooooooooo , it means that I need to pay attention and not question what I'm being told. I really don't mind this as much as you'd think. The human world is much more complicated than that of a dog and I trust him to keep me safe in it. I know he loves me and wouldn't let me come to harm. Absolutely none of this is based on his being another dog in my eyes. I'm much brighter than that. Absolutely all of this is based on common sense, love, mutual respect and an awareness of the differences in communication that necessarily exist in dog/human relationships. It doesn't hurt to understand how dogs and other canids think and live in their own worlds but you don't have to be one to be a part of mine.


Before I'm accused of being as long-winded as my Dad, I'll wrap this up by saying that not all advice, even that coming from an authoritative source, is necessarily good advice and good advice is not necessarily great advice. If all you want from your dog is just someone to lie under the porch and not abuse or embarrass you, I guess there's no harm in that but you are both missing out on something quite special and rewarding. My Dad occupies a place in my life that no other dog could possible fill and I could not possibly be replaced by any human in his. I'd love to see every dog have this special relationship. I think it is a lot more in keeping with the original symbiosis that man and dog have developed over the last several thousand years and is still achievable even in today's urbanized, mechanized technology-driven society. If you feel that you could be getting more out of your relationship with your dog or just wonder what the heck I'm talking about here, I'd love to hear from you.

Things That Make My Life Worth Living

This post was taken from my old webpage. I think there's some good information there and some food for thought.
So what makes a dog's life worth living? I can only speak for myself here. I could survive with just food and water. True, without a vet I wouldn't live quite as long or happy a life but my ancestors did just that for thousands of years. Many years ago, my wild ancestors found that they had some sort of special bond with humans. By keeping each other's company, we could enrich each other's lives by helping one another out, defending them and sharing each other's experiences in life. Over time, that bond has grown to the point that it is no longer an oddity of nature but part of our very makeup. I believe this original bonding occurred due to the fact that we have some of the same attributes. Commonalities I think my dad calls them and greatest among them, I think, is the need for love. Without this, my wild ancestors might just as well have stayed in the woods. Let me tell you what makes my life worth living. I've got everything a dog needs. I live with my folks at their shelter so I've got lots of friends, old and new (I'm the boss of them all). I get plenty to eat and I get excellent medical care but being loved, I mean really LOVED is what makes my life so rewarding. I love pretty much everyone here, dogs, puppies and people alike and I watch over things to make sure nothing bad happens to any of them but I have a very special relationship with my dad. Sure, he picked me out of literally hundreds of rescued puppies to be his own but that, in of itself, is no big deal. What's important is htat he always takes time to let me know that I am special to him, to communicate with me and do fun things with me or just let me hang out with him while he works around the yard and kennels. Whether its taking me to the beach for the very first time, letting me lick his ice cream cone or spending some serious cuddle time, I always know that he loves me and I need that. All dogs do. I've always got his back and he's got mine. The other day we were helping my grandma take her dog Jake for a walk when three big dogs came out growling and wanting to tear him up. My dad and I got in between to make sure nobody got hurt and I was ready to fight. There was no doubt in my mind that, if it came to a fight, my dad and I would be in it together, side by side.

I just wanted to touch a little on communicating. Dogs are very smart and most will try to communicate (in doggy fashion) with their humans. (For a great book on communicating with your pet, check out PETSPEAK) The other day I was playing with my friends while my dad was working on a kennel in the back yard when the sky got very dark and the wind started to blow. This made me a little nervous but I don't really know why. I went out back to find him, looked up at him and then looked up at the sky and back to him. He let me know that he was aware and was watching for any signs of danger himself (it came out a lot like "It'll be a'ight"). Or just yesterday when we took a walk in the woods and wound up on a road that we'd never been on before. Once I realized that we weren't turning off into the old cotton field, I came running back and jumped up at his hand to ask him if he'd made a mistake or something (he is getting a little old you know). Once again, he reassured me that everything was under control (and once again, it sounded a lot like "It'll be a'ight"). It's this part of our relationship that I find to be so special, that someone recognizes that I actually know stuff and am trying to communicate with them. I guess that if no one listened, I'd just stop trying.

Let me tell you about our trip to the beach. First we went shopping at this great doggy store and then stopped for ice cream. When we got onto the beach, there were still a lot of people there and although I'm pretty well behaved, I'm a country dog. I'm much more used to running in the woods than threading through a bunch of sunbathers. At first I was on a leash which I HATE but, even though I could see that my dad had his doubts about letting me run free, he let me try and I rewarded him by being on my best behavior. I'm pretty sure I put one over on him though. My dad has his own language with me that doesn't sound much like what he uses when he talks with other humans but, at some point, he started using these hand signals that I've never seen before. I think he was pretty impressed in thinking that I learned them so quickly but, truth is, I already knew what it was that he wanted me to do (or not do). All the hand signals did was to let me know that he wanted something. It's amazing that so much of our communication is intuitive and unspoken but having this bond is what makes my life worth living.

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Welcome



Hi. I'm Cocopuff, the official spokesdog for Georgia Animal Rescue and Defence Inc ( www.gardonline.org ). Chances are you've already seen me around either at adoption events, on fliers, at the shelter, or out and about with my mom and dad. I feel that I am particularly qualified to speak out on quality of life issues because I have a relationship with my humans that every pet would envy (also because my dad's helping me with this blog as I have somewhat of a tendency to mash several keys at once and I like to chew on the mouse). Not everyone will agree with the opinions expressed here. Please keep in mind that this is just one facet of GARD's efforts to help improve the quality of life for pets and their humans and the views expressed here are merely the opinions of one old man and a dog who loves him.
I have lots to say here. Some of it is pretty basic but OMG, I still see people pull in here and park their car in the sun with their dog inside and the windows rolled up ( they will not be adopting one of OUR dogs ) but most of what I want to share is what we can all do to get the most out of what can and should be a phenomenal relationship between a dog and its human. Beyond sharing my personal opinions, I would love to make this an interactive forum and get your feedback in the form of questions, criticisms, concerns, problems that you’re having etc. I’m a very good listener and with my own four years’ experience at being a dog and my dad’s 60 years of loving dogs, we might all come to a better understanding of this symbiotic relationship that we all have with eachother.
I'm going to let my dad say a few words next and he may, from time to time, have a thing or two to add but we're going to try to minimize that. Lord but he does run on at times!
Please feel free to post your comment (comments are moderated) or email me at cocopuffsblog@hotmail.com with anything you’d like to share.

Hi. I'm Philip, Cocopuff's "dad". I thought it might be fun and a little more interesting to present some ideas on quality of life issues in a collaborative effort with my beloved friend, companion and "helper". Any promise expressed on our website about refraining from anthropomorphizing is null and void here. It is all but impossible to delve into our relationships with our pets without a certain amount of extending our thoughts and values into their personalities. In the best of circumstances, we share a great number of commonalities. Indeed, this is one of the things that makes these relationships so rich and rewarding. If anyone takes offence at the thoughts and opinions expressed here, I am sorry about that. My intent is not to offend but to question and understand in the hope that some good can come from it.
A great part of my motivation as regards to the content of this blog stems from the fact that, in our endeavors, we come into contact with a disturbing number of people with callous, seemingly uncaring attitudes with regard to their pets' welfare, both physically and emotionally. If GARD is ever going to move forward to a point where we are actually helping to provide a long-term solution to our homeless/neglected pet situation here in coastal Georgia, certain issues need to be addressed and hopefully changed for the better. I'm a recent transplant from up north (a recovering Yankee, if you will) and I've often wondered how people here who are so much warmer and so much more human than the New Englanders with whom I've spent most of my 56 years can have among them so many individuals who almost totally lack these qualities when it comes to interacting with their domestic "pets". The best theory that I am able to come up with comes back to the homeless pet population itself. I found myself questioning why so many people that I run into display such a lack of compassion for their pets and treat them in such an irresponsible manner. Now I don't expect the world at large to mirror my own attitudes and sensibilities. I'm to a large degree a product of my environment and upbringing. I grew up in a household where pets (and even domestic farm animals) were valued and well cared for. Almost every dog and cat I've grown up with or had as an adult has either been a stray or been rescued from a bad situation and has been loved, pampered and spoiled rotten. My dad had a reverence and respect for all creatures great and small that, I'm happy to say, I inherited. I take great delight in my relationships with my pets (a number that seems to grow daily) and cherish those that soar to the level of mutual love, respect and understanding that I currently share with my Cocopuff.
So why are my attitudes so different than the individual who gets a dog, chains it to a tree in the backyard, feeds and waters it when and if the thought presents itself, neglects vetting and preventive medicine and when this empty husk of an animal dies, goes out and gets another? I've already recognized the fact that my friends, neighbors and co-workers, as a group, display more of the human characteristics that you would think would make them more capable of love, compassion and empathy. So why do those values not apply to our pets here? I have to go back to environment and upbringing. There is a process (called Value Programming by some) in the early stages of human development whereby core values that, for the most part last a lifetime, are formed and instilled by our surroundings. What we consider normal and acceptable is, to a great degree, defined and determined by what our environment presents to us as a young child. This process has usually solidified by the time a child reaches the age of 7 or so and these core values, once set, are highly resistant to alteration. It usually takes something pretty significant like death, a religious experience or some other type of epiphany to modify any or all of them. Now here I am, 4 year old Philip, growing up in rural Georgia where feral and cast-off pets do not die off in the 45 below zero winters of northern New England. Instead, they have litter after litter of pups, kittens, whatever. Every day I go to town with my folks or on the bus to school to see animals that have been literally ground into the pavement by traffic. On a daily basis, I see homeless animals that are infested with fleas, ticks, and lice. Half starving and awaiting a yet crueler fate. What sort of core values do you think I'm forming as to the relative value of these animals? This is normal. Who can fault me when, as an adult, I fail to take my pooch to the vet for his shots? Sometimes forget that his water dish has not been recently filled? Always forget that this creature is totally dependent on me for not only the physical necessities but the equally important displays of worth and love as well?
Even if I did not like animals, this would present me with a moral dilemma. How on earth can we treat living, breathing, loving creatures in this manner? How can we allow them to exist in such misery? Here at GARD, we do our best to place hundreds of such creatures in homes where they will be valued, loved and cared for and yet, we're doing nothing. Yes, the problem is slightly lessened in our immediate locale but the problem exists everywhere (not just in Georgia) and will continue long after we and our shelter have gone. I'm probably not going to make many converts here. If you're reading this, then you've already set down your core values and, although epiphanies do happen, you are not likely to alter your outlook because of anything presented here. How about our kids though? They are still in their "formative years" and, if we bothered, we could help them to integrate into their developing value-system a deeper sense of value, respect and commensurate responsibility when it comes to other living creatures. GARD itself is still in its formative years but as we grow and organize we hope to put some serious effort into helping youngsters to develop healthier attitudes toward animals through special events and in schools and civic organizations as well.
Why bother? Well, if you're like me and can delineate your life by the number of outstanding dogs (pets) you've had over the years, you already know. If you're not, then Cocopuff and I would encourage you to follow this blog and explore what can be gained through our interactions with our pets.